Halibut's Top 10 Best & Worst Hit Songs of 2013

Sweat

Sweat

Banished
yes, I know it's not even December yet, but here's the problem: by this time, all songs that hit the charts now are more popular in 2014. It's simple logic. Because of this, just to avoid problems for next year (if I'm still on SBM) I will make a 10 best & worst songs of 2013 now.

10. Taylor Swift - I Knew You Were Trouble
We are starting off with the 10 best of 2013, and we are starting with this song. Wow, this song is a very big guilty pleasure of mine. Honestly, it's so bad, it's good. You know that little country princess called Taylor Swift back in 2009? Well, I personally am 100% sure that she's not a country artist anymore. SHE HAS GONE FULL POP! For me, that's sort of bittersweet. This song is just extremely catchy. I actually sort of like the dubstep bass that was put in the song. Other people may hate this song, but I love it.

9. Imagine Dragons - Demons
There are more people who hate Imagine Dragons on this website than I thought. It's the exact opposite at my school. At my school, nobody doesn't like the Imagine Dragons. My friends are obsessed with this band. They even listen to their pre-2012 stuff. That's insane. I do have one more Imagine Dragons song coming up, but for now, we have this #9. This song is one I really like, and it is just so catchy, I can't even classify it at all.

8. Calvin Harris feat. Ellie Goulding - I Need Your Love
People are turning heads at me, aren't they? You know, one embarrassing thing about me is that I LOVE techno music. I REALLY love techno music. In fact, you'll see another techno song on here. Calvin Harris was always boring to me. Feel So Close was sort of gut-wrenchingly bland. This song is completely different. it has a beautiful voice via Ellie Goulding, an actually good techno track, and perfect composition. I don't like it as much as I did before, but I still really love it.

7. Pink feat. Nate Reuss - Just Give Me a Reason
Pink is one of the artists I have the most mixed opinion about. She can be horrible, like in So What, but then she can be really good like in Sober and this song. This song is more-or-less the best-quality song on this list. As you will see from the songs following this, I have a really weird and possibly bad taste in music. This is the last good choice. The reason I like this song so much is by how well-done it is. Honestly, I respect this song more than I love it, but I still genuinely like this song. It has really good writing, and Nate Reuss' vocals are just.... wow.

6. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Wanz - Thrift Shop
This is what I meant in my #7. I'm not exactly classy. Actually, I prefer when a song is really ::dolphin noise::ed up in either the music or the lyrics. That's basically the reason N***** in Paris is one of my favorite songs at the moment. This song doesn't exactly fit that criteria; I was just making a point. Wow, does this song tug me in a good way. The song is catchy, but the main reason I like it is because it's so comfy. It sounds weird but this song is one of those songs that just makes me strangely comfortable. Maybe it's the subject (anti-brand name) but I just am confused by what I should mean by that. It's a funny song, okay? There you go. This is ::dolphin noise::ing awesome.

5. AWOLnation - Sail
This was barely a top 20 hit, but it was in the top 20 enough to qualify my list. Now THIS song fits what I mean by ::dolphin noise::ed up songs. This song is the most unapologetic, mixed up, weird piece of schlop I have ever heard.... and I ::dolphin noise::ing love every second of it. This song is so epic and it just makes my heart going. This is a song that I would listen to for pumping myself up. That sounds weird, but this song is just so thumpy and so catchy that I can't resist it. In my personal point of view, this song has a sort of good quality that I've noticed where it actually means something, too.

4. Eminem - Berzerk
Eminem is back, you stupid ::dolphin noise::ing ::dolphin noise::es. Finally, after such a long time. 2004 to 2007- he was cheesy and nonsensical. 2008 to 2012- he was whiny and overly dramatic. Now, he's back to his 1999 to 2003 form. That's the Eminem I liked: the dangerous one. He's mean. He's pushy. He's a piece of crap (in a good way, of course.) With most of these songs, I had to sort of get used to them until I started really liking them. With this song, I loved it as soon as I heard it. It's the song that defines the Marshall Mathers LP 2.

3. Lorde - Royals
This is the least weird choice on the list for sure. At the time of this post, this song is #1 for the sixth week. That is ::dolphin noise::ing incredible. A song that basically hates on pop culture is #1. I.... I don't even know how. As far as I'm concerned, Thrift Shop (another indie song making fun of pop culture) only hit #1 because of how funny it was. This song isn't even funny. It's just straightforward. It's basically saying "Pop culture these days is ::dolphin noise::ing stupid. You should feel ashamed." I sort of do. I feel guilty of my #1 now. thanks Lorde. Someone's trashin' the hotel room in homage.

2. Imagine Dragons - It's Time
DON'T BEAT ME DON'T BEAT ME DON'T BEAT ME DON'T BEAT ME! I swear, I already feel people's disappointment for me putting It's Time as my #2. I'M SORRY. I just love this song! I love Imagine Dragons. Blow me up, go ahead. Go ahead and blow me up. The lead singer of this band is absolutely beautiful and the composition is amazing. The lyrics are majestical and and the whole song is completely dramatic. There, I voiced my opinion. This song sells it, and you have the right to shake your head at me. Now I know how Todd feels for putting California Gurls as #2 on his best of 2010. Happy days for me, I suppose.

And now for some honorable mentions:
Lady Gaga "Applause" While this song is definitely exciting, it's a bit too boring for me to like that much.
Justin Bieber feat. Nicki Minaj "Beauty and a Beat" This is my biggest guilty pleasure of the year. I just think it's catchy. Screw me.
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Ray Dalton "Can't Hold Us" Same as Applause. While it's good, it's just too boring.
fun. "Carry On" This song would have been on the list if it wasn't for it's very short run on the charts.
OneRepublic "Counting Stars" Read Applause.
Florida Georgia Line feat. Nelly "Cruise" I used to like this song a lot, but it grew out of me fast. Sad, I know.
Anna Kendrick "Cups" I just like how there was a folk song on the charts. Read Applause.
Lady Gaga feat. R. Kelly "Do What U Want" I like this song quite a bit, but it's way too new for me to put on the list, sadly.
Swedish House Mafia feat. John Martin "Don't You Worry Child" This was extremely close to being on my list, but I found 10 other songs better than it. I'm sad now.
Daft Punk feat. Pharrell "Get Lucky" I respect this song more than I like it, honestly.
Jay-Z feat. Justin Timberlake "Holy Grail" Read Applause.
Mumford & Sons "I Will Wait" Read Applause.
Passenger "Let Her Go" This song is also too new for me to put on the list.
Of Monsters and Men "Little Talks" This song is too old, actually.
Fall Out Boy "My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark (Light 'em Up)" Like Cruise, this song sadly grew out of me.
Imagine Dragons "Radioactive" Sooner or later, I also got sick of the song's overplay value.
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Mary Lambert "Same Love" This song is honestly boring. I know it has a good message, but I'm sorry, but this song bores me. I respect this song more than I like it.
Lana Del Rey feat. Cedric Gervais "Summertime Sadness" This song would have been on the list if it WASN'T THE MOTHER::dolphin noise::ING TECHNO EDIT THAT WAS THE ONE THAT CHARTED HIGH!

1. Zedd feat. Foxes - Clarity
Now this song deserves to be my #1 for sure. This song is nearly perfect. The lyrics have a lot of clarity (lelz), the musical composition has some of the best house beats I have ever heard, and Foxes' vocals are of the ::dolphin noise:: angels, man. The only good way to describe this song is "Wow." There's no other way to put it. It's one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard. Plus, it's not just the song that I really love. It's also the music video. Check it out now. It's basically a Michael Bay film mixed with LSD. It's that awesome. This song is the most perfect song of the year, and I'm not hearing word from anybody else.

My Bottom 10 is coming tomorrow. Don't wait up.
 
Dude, I enjoy listening to freaking Panic! At the Disco and Coldplay, so I don't think I'll mock you too much for your tastes here. (Also, doesn't Todd do his worst of year lists first?)

However, I haven't heard many of these songs, so I will spend the next two hours listening to them and I'll get back to you.
 
I'm pretty sure I have worst taste in music than you, so don't worry about it.

Oh, and What Does the Fox Say? is a work of genius.
 
10 good
9 amazing
8 great
7 zzzzzzzzz... Soooooo booooored
6 in terms of combined favorite song and billboard success thiswould be my number one
5 good t I don't listen to it much
4 amazing
3 amazing
2 good but I like demons better
1 pretty amazing
 
And now for my bottom 10!

10. Maroon 5 - Love Somebody
I'm ::dolphin noise:: sick of Maroon 5. I'm ::dolphin noise:: sick of them. I can go as far as saying they are my least favorite band of all time. There, I said it. They are my LEAST favorite band of all time. Worse than Creed. Worse than Nickelback. Worse than all of these. You know why? Adam Levine's arrogance. His douchebagy behavior severely pisses me off. Honestly, it doesn't even show in this song, though. The reason this song is actually on here is because it's boring. It's boring, and it also adds insult to injury that Adam Levine is still complaining about finding, ahem, "true love."

9. Taylor Swift - 22
You know how I put I Knew You Were Trouble as my tenth favorite song of 2013? Well, I have a split opinion of Taylor Swift just as much as I do with Pink. On a good day, she makes stuff like You Belong With Me, Eyes Open, and I Knew You Were Trouble. On bad days, she makes The Story of Us, Red, and ESPECIALLY 22. This song pisses me off. The big difference between this and I Knew You Were Trouble is the lyrics. That's basically what it is. Taylor Swift sounds spoiled as ::dolphin noise:: in this song. At least in I Knew You Were Trouble, she tries. In this one, she just talks about how happy she is even though she broke up with so many guys who take advantage of her. That's just insane.

8. Baauer - Harlem Shake
You know, it's not even the song itself I hate about the Harlem Shake. In fact, I sort of like the song. No, the big reason why this is on the list is that I've heard so many 30-second clips of the song, that I just can't take it anymore. You know this was #1 for 5 weeks because of one 2-month-long fad? That's basically why Billboard doesn't care anymore. The thing is, Baauer actually IS a good techno artist. Go listen to his song Samurai. His stuff is actually good, but people in America are misusing this song to the point where I don't want to hear the song EVER AGAIN.

7. Lil Wayne feat. Drake and Future - Love Me
You know, it's gotten to the point where there's so much idiotic gangsta rap on the charts today, I don't care anymore. I just don't really "hate" them. They're all the same to me these days. The problem I listened to this song right before I cracked and didn't care anymore. This is the song that made that happen. Lil Wayne can just go burn in hell for all I care. Actually, Drake is okay in this song. That's why it's so low. It's Future that pissed me off. That guy has the worst use of autotune of anybody in history. I just wish Turn Off the Lights was a big song, so I can put it on here. Sadly, it's not. This is the only gangster rap song on here, and be lucky.

6. Lana Del Rey feat. Cedric Gervais - Summertime Sadness (Radio Edit)
WHY!? WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY!? ONE OF THE BEST SONGS OF THE YEAR, SUMMERTIME SADNESS, BARELY CHARTED, AND THE SUPER ::dolphin noise::TY REMIX OF IT IS STILL IN THE TOP FORTY!? NO NO NO! NOT OKAY! THAT IS NOT COOL! Okay, I calmed myself down. But seriously. That just should not happen. There is no excuse for that whatsoever. None. No excuses. I guess it's an okay remix, but its popularity upright pisses me off. I read a Billboard article on this song saying "This song is the perfect way to celebrate summer of 2013." NO. THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS. THIS SONG IS SUPPOSED TO BE SAD! IT'S IN THE TITLE FOR GOD'S SAKES. This is how low humanity has gotten. Unbelievable.

5. Pitbull feat. Christina Aguilera - Feel This Moment
When Pitbull is good, fine. When Pitbull sucks, it's unbelievable how bad he can get. That's what this song is all about. This song is recycles trash. Christina Aguilera. The lyrics. The ::dolphin noise:: Take On Me Riff. All of this song is terrible. The reason it isn't any higher is the fact that Pitbull is always redeeming himself and it just annoys me. This song is the dark horse of the top ten for sure. It's so bad, it's excusable. That's the big problem with this song. There's not a better way to say it. You say potato, I say go ::dolphin noise:: yourself.

4. Maroon 5 - Daylight
Yup. This is the last Maroon 5 song on here. You knew this was going to happen. You just knew it. But guess what, it's not so high because it's necessarily bad! It's because it's *falls asleep* *slapped in the face* WHA-WHA-WHA! I think I just fell asleep. Yeah, I think you get it. This song is so boring. I don't remember ::dolphin noise:: about it once I listen to it. I can't talk about this song because it's so boring. Maroon 5 is pretty much the worst of both worlds: stupid AND boring. That's sad.

3. PSY - Gentleman
I think it's safe to say songs 3 to 1 are predictable. While they will definitely appeal to you guys, I still hate them with my dear heart. Starting off the top 3, we have Gangnam Style's deformed, disfigured brother. I can just stop there, because that's basically what the song is. It's PSY's horrible attempt to recreate Gangnam Style, his one and only genuine hit song. When I listened to this song, I felt sort of sorry for that guy. He tries to recreate Gangnam Style, and he hits the ground running on sharp gravel. That's how much of a failure this song is.

2. Miley Cyrus - We Can't Stop
Miley Cyrus completely lost her mind. It all started with Can't Be Tamed, which is basically the start of "bad" Miley Cyrus. The Miley Cyrus that nobody likes except for poisoned fans on Twitter. The reason Wrecking Ball isn't on here is because it actually sounded okay, even though it had the worst music video of the year. (This song would've been a close 2nd.) I think it's the fact that this song is just mixed up in a pretty bad way. Basically, this song is absolute dirt. Everybody knows that. Nobody on this site likes Miley Cyrus, that's for sure. People are sick of here, and I just know it. Miley Cyrus, if you're reading this, YOU ACTUALLY CAN STOP. SO STOP.






















1. will.i.am feat. Justin Bieber - #thatpower
You guys expected this, didn't you? This song is the worst song for so many reasons. First of all, will.i.am and Justin Bieber are 2 of my least favorite artists of all time. They both suck asshole, I tell you what. Second of all, the Twitter advertising this song holds really annoys me in a nitpicky kind of way. Third of all, the beat gets stuck in my mind in a bad way. I'm sort of surprised on how badly catchy it is. Fourth of all, THE SONG IS ::dolphin noise:: STUPID AS ::dolphin noise:: ::dolphin noise::ITY ::dolphin noise::! will.i.am and Justin Bieber are both idiots. There's no doubt about it. You can't like this song. You just can't. Now that's why it's my least favorite song of the year. See you and goodbye!


2013 verdict: This year may have been a lot more different than the last few years, but the humanity in music these days has definitely fell down. I give this year in music a 7 out of 10.
 
HarryPotterLives said:
I'm pretty sure I have worst taste in music than you, so don't worry about it.

Oh, and What Does the Fox Say? is a work of genius.
Click to expand...
Thank you. You, my special friend, have amazing and best taste in music. ^This person gets the idea here.
 
Halibut said:
yes, I know it's not even December yet, but here's the problem: by this time, all songs that hit the charts now are more popular in 2014. It's simple logic. Because of this, just to avoid problems for next year (if I'm still on SBM) I will make a 10 best & worst songs of 2013 now.

10. Taylor Swift - I Knew You Were Trouble
We are starting off with the 10 best of 2013, and we are starting with this song. Wow, this song is a very big guilty pleasure of mine. Honestly, it's so bad, it's good. You know that little country princess called Taylor Swift back in 2009? Well, I personally am 100% sure that she's not a country artist anymore. SHE HAS GONE FULL POP! For me, that's sort of bittersweet. This song is just extremely catchy. I actually sort of like the dubstep bass that was put in the song. Other people may hate this song, but I love it.

9. Imagine Dragons - Demons
There are more people who hate Imagine Dragons on this website than I thought. It's the exact opposite at my school. At my school, nobody doesn't like the Imagine Dragons. My friends are obsessed with this band. They even listen to their pre-2012 stuff. That's insane. I do have one more Imagine Dragons song coming up, but for now, we have this #9. This song is one I really like, and it is just so catchy, I can't even classify it at all.

8. Calvin Harris feat. Ellie Goulding - I Need Your Love
People are turning heads at me, aren't they? You know, one embarrassing thing about me is that I LOVE techno music. I REALLY love techno music. In fact, you'll see another techno song on here. Calvin Harris was always boring to me. Feel So Close was sort of gut-wrenchingly bland. This song is completely different. it has a beautiful voice via Ellie Goulding, an actually good techno track, and perfect composition. I don't like it as much as I did before, but I still really love it.

7. Pink feat. Nate Reuss - Just Give Me a Reason
Pink is one of the artists I have the most mixed opinion about. She can be horrible, like in So What, but then she can be really good like in Sober and this song. This song is more-or-less the best-quality song on this list. As you will see from the songs following this, I have a really weird and possibly bad taste in music. This is the last good choice. The reason I like this song so much is by how well-done it is. Honestly, I respect this song more than I love it, but I still genuinely like this song. It has really good writing, and Nate Reuss' vocals are just.... wow.

6. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Wanz - Thrift Shop
This is what I meant in my #7. I'm not exactly classy. Actually, I prefer when a song is really ::dolphin noise::ed up in either the music or the lyrics. That's basically the reason N***** in Paris is one of my favorite songs at the moment. This song doesn't exactly fit that criteria; I was just making a point. Wow, does this song tug me in a good way. The song is catchy, but the main reason I like it is because it's so comfy. It sounds weird but this song is one of those songs that just makes me strangely comfortable. Maybe it's the subject (anti-brand name) but I just am confused by what I should mean by that. It's a funny song, okay? There you go. This is ::dolphin noise::ing awesome.

5. AWOLnation - Sail
This was barely a top 20 hit, but it was in the top 20 enough to qualify my list. Now THIS song fits what I mean by ::dolphin noise::ed up songs. This song is the most unapologetic, mixed up, weird piece of schlop I have ever heard.... and I ::dolphin noise::ing love every second of it. This song is so epic and it just makes my heart going. This is a song that I would listen to for pumping myself up. That sounds weird, but this song is just so thumpy and so catchy that I can't resist it. In my personal point of view, this song has a sort of good quality that I've noticed where it actually means something, too.

4. Eminem - Berzerk
Eminem is back, you stupid ::dolphin noise::ing ::dolphin noise::es. Finally, after such a long time. 2004 to 2007- he was cheesy and nonsensical. 2008 to 2012- he was whiny and overly dramatic. Now, he's back to his 1999 to 2003 form. That's the Eminem I liked: the dangerous one. He's mean. He's pushy. He's a piece of crap (in a good way, of course.) With most of these songs, I had to sort of get used to them until I started really liking them. With this song, I loved it as soon as I heard it. It's the song that defines the Marshall Mathers LP 2.

3. Lorde - Royals
This is the least weird choice on the list for sure. At the time of this post, this song is #1 for the sixth week. That is ::dolphin noise::ing incredible. A song that basically hates on pop culture is #1. I.... I don't even know how. As far as I'm concerned, Thrift Shop (another indie song making fun of pop culture) only hit #1 because of how funny it was. This song isn't even funny. It's just straightforward. It's basically saying "Pop culture these days is ::dolphin noise::ing stupid. You should feel ashamed." I sort of do. I feel guilty of my #1 now. thanks Lorde. Someone's trashin' the hotel room in homage.

2. Imagine Dragons - It's Time
DON'T BEAT ME DON'T BEAT ME DON'T BEAT ME DON'T BEAT ME! I swear, I already feel people's disappointment for me putting It's Time as my #2. I'M SORRY. I just love this song! I love Imagine Dragons. Blow me up, go ahead. Go ahead and blow me up. The lead singer of this band is absolutely beautiful and the composition is amazing. The lyrics are majestical and and the whole song is completely dramatic. There, I voiced my opinion. This song sells it, and you have the right to shake your head at me. Now I know how Todd feels for putting California Gurls as #2 on his best of 2010. Happy days for me, I suppose.

And now for some honorable mentions:
Lady Gaga "Applause" While this song is definitely exciting, it's a bit too boring for me to like that much.
Justin Bieber feat. Nicki Minaj "Beauty and a Beat" This is my biggest guilty pleasure of the year. I just think it's catchy. Screw me.
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Ray Dalton "Can't Hold Us" Same as Applause. While it's good, it's just too boring.
fun. "Carry On" This song would have been on the list if it wasn't for it's very short run on the charts.
OneRepublic "Counting Stars" Read Applause.
Florida Georgia Line feat. Nelly "Cruise" I used to like this song a lot, but it grew out of me fast. Sad, I know.
Anna Kendrick "Cups" I just like how there was a folk song on the charts. Read Applause.
Lady Gaga feat. R. Kelly "Do What U Want" I like this song quite a bit, but it's way too new for me to put on the list, sadly.
Swedish House Mafia feat. John Martin "Don't You Worry Child" This was extremely close to being on my list, but I found 10 other songs better than it. I'm sad now.
Daft Punk feat. Pharrell "Get Lucky" I respect this song more than I like it, honestly.
Jay-Z feat. Justin Timberlake "Holy Grail" Read Applause.
Mumford & Sons "I Will Wait" Read Applause.
Passenger "Let Her Go" This song is also too new for me to put on the list.
Of Monsters and Men "Little Talks" This song is too old, actually.
Fall Out Boy "My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark (Light 'em Up)" Like Cruise, this song sadly grew out of me.
Imagine Dragons "Radioactive" Sooner or later, I also got sick of the song's overplay value.
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Mary Lambert "Same Love" This song is honestly boring. I know it has a good message, but I'm sorry, but this song bores me. I respect this song more than I like it.
Lana Del Rey feat. Cedric Gervais "Summertime Sadness" This song would have been on the list if it WASN'T THE MOTHER::dolphin noise::ING TECHNO EDIT THAT WAS THE ONE THAT CHARTED HIGH!

1. Zedd feat. Foxes - Clarity
Now this song deserves to be my #1 for sure. This song is nearly perfect. The lyrics have a lot of clarity (lelz), the musical composition has some of the best house beats I have ever heard, and Foxes' vocals are of the ::dolphin noise:: angels, man. The only good way to describe this song is "Wow." There's no other way to put it. It's one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard. Plus, it's not just the song that I really love. It's also the music video. Check it out now. It's basically a Michael Bay film mixed with LSD. It's that awesome. This song is the most perfect song of the year, and I'm not hearing word from anybody else.

My Bottom 10 is coming tomorrow. Don't wait up.
Click to expand...
10. Yesssss
9. IDK if i've heard this one
8. Meh
7. It's all they play on the radio where I live, so it's gotten tiresome from me
6. lol guilty pleasure of mine
5. Never heard
4. Never heard
3. what
2. Not sure if i've heard this
1. Never heard
 
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